Nope! We're Not Monogamous

13

Ellecia Paine is a non-monogamy relationship coach who helps people navigate ENM (Enthusiastic non-monogamy), polyamory, open relating, swinging, kink, tantra and life in general. Listen in to the candid conversations that give you a peek into the inner lives of other non-monogamous folks. Hear how they've overcome challenges like jealousy, insecurity, and social scrutiny. And celebrate with them as they share all the reasons it's worth it to have relationships that don't fit in the box. 

Recent Episodes
  • Reframing Jealousy as a Powerful Tool in Open Relationships with Dr. Emma Smith
    May 1, 2025 – 53:24
  • Jealousy to Compersion: Communicating Through Emotions in Open Relationships with Ally Iseman
    Apr 24, 2025 – 42:38
  • Why You Keep Comparing Yourself to Your Metamour (And How to Stop), Ep. 107
    Apr 17, 2025 – 14:51
  • Open Monogamy, Jealousy & Mismatched Desires | Dr. Tammy Nelson on Rethinking Relationship Agreements
    Apr 10, 2025 – 50:53
  • Unmasking Ashley Madison: Why People Cheat & What It Reveals About Modern Relationships, Ep. 105
    Apr 3, 2025 – 52:07
  • 5 Simple Tools for Profound Intimacy in Non-Monogamy, Ep. 104
    Mar 27, 2025 – 35:50
  • Thriving in Non Monogamous Social Situations Without Drama, Ep. 103
    Mar 20, 2025 – 52:36
  • From Should to Could - Designing Your Non-monogamous Relationships, Ep. 102
    Mar 13, 2025 – 41:52
  • The Hidden Price Tag of Figuring Out Non Monogamy Alone
    Mar 6, 2025 – 21:18
  • Building Polyamorous Community and Connections with Aly Moon
    Feb 27, 2025 – 50:49
  • The #1 Secret to Thriving in Open Relationships, Ep. 99
    Feb 20, 2025 – 14:00
  • The Anxious Person's Toolkit for Successful Non-Monogamous Connections with Lola Phoenix
    Feb 13, 2025 – 47:49
  • The Hidden Costs of Ignoring Jealousy in Non-Monogamous Relationships, EP. 97
    Feb 6, 2025 – 19:11
  • Reignite Your Dating Life: Overcoming App Burnout and Finding Your People
    Jan 30, 2025 – 53:54
  • Why DIY Jealousy Solutions Fall Short in Non Monogamy
    Jan 23, 2025 – 11:17
  • The Unexpected Paths of Non-Monogamy: A Conversation with Annie Undone, EP. 94
    Jan 16, 2025 – 47:22
  • How to Turn Jealousy Into a Tool for Growth, Ep. 93
    Jan 9, 2025 – 35:23
  • Why 2025 is the Year to Let Go of Jealousy, Ep. 92
    Jan 2, 2025 – 14:34
  • Polyamory Explored: Jealousy, Communication and Coming Out Strategies With Kathy Labriola
    Dec 26, 2024 – 53:48
  • Graceful Rejection: The Art of Saying No Without Burning Bridges
    Dec 12, 2024 – 27:44
  • Beyond Swiping Finding Authentic Connections in Seattle
    Nov 28, 2024 – 28:58
  • Catapults and Consent: When Kink and Polyamory Overlap with Still
    Nov 14, 2024 – 01:02:17
  • Boundaries, Bedrooms, and Beyond, Navigating Non Monogamous Dating with Shannon Whaley
    Oct 31, 2024 – 52:39
  • Beyond Vanilla The Intersection of Polyamory and Kink with Maeve McBride
    Oct 17, 2024 – 01:02:39
  • Sex Geeks Get Real: Consent Talks Before Getting Busy with Reid Mahalko
    Oct 3, 2024 – 50:24
  • Managing Jealousy in Open Relationships with Therapist Ann Russo
    Sep 19, 2024 – 47:03
  • Shuffling Relationship Dynamics with a Deck of Cards, Ep. 83
    Sep 5, 2024 – 43:48
  • Fluid Bonding and STI Awareness Navigating Sexual Health in Ethical Non-Monogamy with Susan Bratton
    Aug 22, 2024 – 01:14:02
  • Monogamy? In this Economy? With Author Laura Boyle
    Aug 8, 2024 – 52:01
  • Navigating Consent and Pleasure in Non-Monogamy with Jamie Love
    Jul 25, 2024 – 43:02
  • Polyamorous Elders: Planning for Your Future
    Jul 11, 2024 – 48:55
  • The Alchemy of Pleasure: Transforming Relationships with Sasha and Moritz
    Jun 27, 2024 – 01:09:08
  • First Date Fun: Navigating Non-Monogamy with Humor and Insight
    Jun 13, 2024 – 59:31
  • From Strict Religion to Ceremonial Celebrations: Dan's Story
    May 30, 2024 – 01:03:59
  • Unpacking the Relationship Escalator: Lessons from 2 Decades of Ethical Non-Monogamy
    May 16, 2024 – 43:45
  • No Rules Polyamory: Exploring Pleasure, Tantra and Sex Magic
    May 2, 2024 – 44:51
  • Beyond Fairy Tales: Real Connection Strategies Unveiled
    Apr 18, 2024 – 57:27
  • The Marathon Problem: Overcoming Fears to Embrace Non-monogamy with Poly Pocket Podcast Ep. 72
    Apr 4, 2024 – 01:03:14
  • From Polyamory to Monogamish: Relationship Coach Gets Real About Polyamory, Ep. 71
    Mar 21, 2024 – 46:09
  • Polyamory Pitfalls: Handling Jealousy in Non-Monogamy with Ali Hendry, Ep. 70
    Mar 7, 2024 – 44:28
  • How I Learned to Embrace Abundance in Non-Monogamous Relationships, Ep. 69
    Feb 22, 2024 – 48:19
  • Self-Love, Jealousy, and Somatic Healing in Non-monogamous Relationships
    Feb 8, 2024 – 46:54
  • Shedding Resentment and Finding Freedom in Ethical Non-Monogamy with Daisy Sky
    Jan 25, 2024 – 47:40
  • Embracing Your True Self: The Journey Through Non-Monogamy, Jealousy, and Sacred Rage with Sandra Possing
    Jan 11, 2024 – 49:42
  • Thriving in Non-Monogamy: Deana Tanner's Guide to Healthy Humaning, Ep. 65
    Dec 26, 2023 – 53:27
  • Finding Balance in an Unconventional BDSM Triad, Ep. 64
    Dec 14, 2023 – 46:43
  • Sexual Safety in Non-monogamy with Evalene Dacker-MD
    Nov 30, 2023 – 57:31
  • Unlocking Desire: Exploring the Transformative Power of Sexual Fantasies with Artemisia De Vine
    Nov 16, 2023 – 54:07
  • Radical Honesty and Responsibility in Non-Monogamous Relationships with Leslie Tavernier
    Nov 2, 2023 – 54:29
  • Polywise - A Deeper Dive Into Navigating Open Relationships with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
    Oct 18, 2023 – 01:03:29
Recent Reviews
  • TravelingWildWoman
    This podcast is life changing!!
    I have been binging this pod and it’s seriously been life changing! I’ve learned so much about myself, relationship dynamics, conversations I need to have with partners, what I do and don’t want in a poly relationship, and so much more. Ellecia’s voice is like honey and so easy to listen to and she has the best guests on. I recommend this to anyone who wants to learn more about relationships beyond monogamy so they can have more of the sex and relationships they want.
  • CJ@noshamewithcj
    Not about convincing you but sharing info
    I love the candor and openness of Ellecia and her guests. Everyone brings their own approaches to ways of relating and I love that there is space to have these conversations.
  • Miss Lissa1
    Love this series
    Finally figures put how to review, lol. Love love love this podcast! I always get some kind of tip that I can apply to my life. Thanks for normalizing polyamory and thank you for having such honest, emotionally intelligent and valuable information. Keep them coming!
  • Deirdre Tshien
    A great listen
    Ellecia's candid exploration into relationships beyond traditional boundaries is invaluable. This podcast is engaging and thought-provoking, a great listen for those seeking insights into different perspectives on love and connection. Deirdre
  • Daisies 173383
    Entertaining and so useful!
    This podcast is wonderful! Each episode is engaging and light hearted while also teaching great lessons around mental health, culture, and obviously non-monogamy. I listen to this podcast every day! Thanks for the great content and life lessons.
  • Sw33twat3r
    I appreciate her acceptance
    I’m enjoying this podcast so much! I’m somewhat new to non-monogamy, one year, and the flavor of my primary relationship has evolved SO MUCH as we get more comfortable with it. We fall somewhere between swingers and poly, and having friends with benefits. I feel that I would be accepted and not judged by you! I feel empowered by you to just do what’s best for me and my relationship and not need a label. You and your guests are all so accepting and sex-positive. Thank you for spreading awareness and acceptance!
  • HealthPornPodcast
    Fun and educational for any human
    This podcast provides not only great advice for non-monogamous people, but for everyone in general. The tips we get for reflecting on our own emotions are tools anyone can put to use!
  • alittlebitangie
    Way to go! 👏👏
    Candid conversations about all aspects of live are SO important, so it's so cool to see that Ellecia is talking about a subject that is typically so hush-hush! Not many things DO fit into a one-size-fits-all box, so the more open we can be, the more we can help others who are out there trying to figure out life! 💕
  • Jlee.savegan
    The podcast you didn’t know you needed
    Timing is everything and I am so grateful that my aesthetician recommended this podcast exactly when she did. I needed it more than I could have expected. If you are considering non-monogamy, or are already in the deep end, this podcast is SO HELPFUL. Ellecia is such a warm and lively host and has such engaging conversations with each person. Every guest has brought on a unique view , and presented necessary tools on now to navigate relationships more consciously. How to show up for yourself and your partners, how to recognize, work with, and learn from your emotions…the important things. Who knew there was so much to learn in this world?? Truly, these conversations are thoughtful and have helped provide really great building blocks to continue to do personal work so that I can cultivate, and really appreciate, the fullest love-filled life. Give it a listen, find yourself in the stories shared, take the golden nuggets and grow along the ride.
  • salacious rumb
    Valid Validation
    I met Ellecia Paine through Instagram and she invited on her show to talk about my non-monogamy. Honestly, this is the first time I have been reached out to by someone who coaches in this community, so I started listening to her Podcast to get a feel for her style and… her Validation IS VALID! I have experienced a lot of tolerance about who I am (you just KNOW when someone doesn’t validate you but doesn’t have the intestinal fortitude to tell you up front your authenticity threatens them), and it is not the same as being validated. This Podcast may not solve all of your problems, but I believe if a Podcast is going to help you feel validated about being, practicing, feeling, or even being curious in ethical non-monogamy THIS WILL DO IT! And you deserve to be validated, so give this Podcast a solid listen!
  • SuzyQ131313
    Awesome!
    This podcast is amazing and exactly what I needed in my life right now. My wife and I are transitioning from monogamous to non-monogamous and the podcasts are 100% on point. Thank you so much!!
  • April Filiczkowski
    So needed!
    Thank you for bringing this out in the open so we can all be more free and have a place to relate.
  • mrschristoe
    Amazing!
    Thanks for creating a space for real life and polyamory. Love this so much!
  • Mari_from_NJ
    I felt so seen
    What a great way to talk about the challenges in non-monogamy. For me, it was always scary to think I had to do things I didn’t want to do. Like, sure I’ll end up doing things I don’t want to do if I don’t have clear boundaries. Boundaries are hard, and for many of us, it starts with being embodied. Great podcast!
  • S&J+1
    Heck yeah!
    You are too cool! So excited to hear more. Thanks for being you.
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